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Monday, April 30, 2007
8:00 PM
keep the faith up..
complain, complain, grumble, and growl
'tis all that we do when everything's foul
to sulk, to blame, to weep, to go astray
'tis all that we do when it must be to pray.
anger, regret, abhorrence, and depression
'tis all that we feel when we long for asphyxiation
to cut, to bleed, to smoke, to drink
'tis all that we do when we crave no more to think.
what must we do when all have turned their backs on us?
how must we feel when there is no one we can trust?
why must life always cause us such grief and pain?
who can we turn to in our times of disdain?
when all are angered because of our mistakes
when living your life is like a nightmare when you're awake
when you feel like everything you once had is lost
all you must do is turn to the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost.
for even family can fail at times
and somtimes love can hurt, even for someone who tries
and friends are forever isn't always true
only the Supreme Being will surely help you get through.
so pray, pray, gratify, and worship
for the Lord God will alleviate you in all your hardships
to love, to have faith, to be patient, to hope, to stay strong
when you do all these things you'll find where you belong.
~ for you.. <3
...the end...
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4:40 PM
(-_-)
sat.. ek..
sun.. splash island..
*bow*
...the end...
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Wednesday, April 25, 2007
11:38 PM
multiply.. XD
...the end...
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12:10 PM
keep the faith up..
today, i planned on posting about my horrid day at the U.S. Embassy..
how i was supposed to be rejoicing because my visa was supposed to be rejected but my mom brought the "saviour".. my sister's passport..
then i decided to not update my blog..
then i decided to update it..
because.. although a lot of things didn't go my way today, in a way, it still turned out pretty well..
i was able to resist slitting my wrists by praying..
"keep the faith up.."
i also felt a lot better when i spoke with zion.. <3
also, helping my bestfriend out with an enigma helped me take my mind off my stressful day..
i actually really liked helping her..
the last time i was able to really do something like that was when i was in the sixth grade..
i guess that was one of the reasons why i was never that problematic.. because i enjoyed helping my friends out so much that i didn't have time to ponder on my problems.. they just fixed themselves..
ever since i started in high school, that didn't happen again..
so, thanks..
although you think that you should be thanking me..
honestly, i should thank you more than you should thank me.. :)
but like all problems, they become resolved..
in a way, her problem's already resolved..
and as soon as that happened..
:-<
i think you already know..
i guess there's only one thing to do..
keep the faith up..
...the end...
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Monday, April 23, 2007
7:42 PM
unanticipated
first of all, i'd like to inform you that i will not be able to promise you daily posts/updates because for this week, my activities will include entertaining my cousins from General Santos, and if i have time, playing sungka until i get sick of it.. :)
now, on with the very short update..
today, a lot of things happened that didn't go as planned..
and i thought that my day would be ruined..
it almost was..
but God has a way of making things go your way just when you're about to complain about the annoying disruptions you've been having all day..
and i must say..
God is great.. :)
He really made my day very happy..
thank You Lord..
i love You..
:)
everything that happened today was so unanticipated..
don't you agree? ;)
...the end...
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Saturday, April 21, 2007
9:17 PM
my posts..
this update is about my previous posts..
hmm.. well.. i just read some of my posts during the past few months of my blogging life and i must say..
what must i say? well, i'd like to describe most of my posts and i've found the perfect adjective..
CORNY.
haha.. i must admit.. my "posting skills" have really improved since i started blogging..
i guess improvement does occur gradually..
anyway.. that's all that i wanted to say..
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
btw, since you're reading this post, you already know my blog's new url.
please do not share this information with anyone who i am related to.
thanks.
p.s.
just a little info about the new url..
you see, my real name was supposed to be AGNES.. but that's already my name..
so they changed it to AISHA.. but it wasn't in the Bible.. [that's what they always tell me..]
so they changed it to ADALGHEEZA.. but a lot of family members didn't like it.. *ginisang ada*
so it evolved to ADA MARIE.. *tada!*
...the end...
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8:27 PM
puerto galera.. puerto nirvana..
okay.. two posts for today..
one about the puerto galera trip and another about.. well, just read it..
but, of course, after i post the 2 updates, you'll be reading the second one first..
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
i will not be discussing our jaunt in full detail..
day 1: thursday
road trip to batangas..
speedboat ride to puerto galera..
jeepney ride to puerto nirvana, the resort..
swimming at tamaraw falls..
swimming at the resort..
swimming at the beach..
WALKING ON WATER.. :))
waiting for american idol on abc..
falling asleep just as american idol was about to begin.. :))
day 2: friday
turtle pictorial..
swimming.. swimming.. swimming..
did i already mention swimming?
jeepney ride to white beach..
souvenir buying..
dinner..
jeepney ride back to puerto nirvana..
zZzZzZzZzZz..
day 3: saturday
swimming..
check-out..
jeepney ride to the dock..
a very sea sickening speetboat ride..
road trip to qc..
*bow*
...the end...
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Tuesday, April 17, 2007
8:55 PM
lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala..
based on the title, you can tell that this will once again be one of my senseless posts..
actually, i already had a topic in mind but i'm not really in the mood to type a long post..
so i end this post.. haha.. :))
bbye.
...the end...
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Monday, April 16, 2007
10:08 PM
passion..
passion..
people are passionate about a lot of things..
i wonder.. what is the root of passion..?
people are passionate about the things that they're good at.. about the things that they've learned to love..
and for me.. it's music and theatre arts.. put 'em together and what have you got? bippity boppity boom! musical theatre..
so far, last summer was the best summer of my teenage life..
it was the most emotional, but it was also the most fulfilling..
being able to participate in an original musical play.. in a play where you composed the songs.. can really boost one's self-esteem.. :)
and being able to play a "perfect" piece during your 5th guitar recital really makes you feel that all those years of self-studying and taking lessons have really paid off.. :)
good times... good times... :)
forgive me for being a braggart but please.. cut me some slack.. these experiences rarely happen in my life..
but why is it whenever someone asks me what my first choice will be in my college application, i always say SpEd..?
why do i not say Theatre Arts or Music?
because if i did choose either of the two, i wouldn't be doing much for anyone but me..
and well.. frankly.. i don't have much faith in my "talents".. if you can call them that..
but if i were really passionate about those things, i would pursue them.. wouldn't i..? shouldn't i..?
but i most probably won't..
does that mean i'm not really passionate about music and theatre arts..?
no.. of course not.
so.. what is the root of passion?
why are we passionate about the things that we are passionate about..?
is it because we love these things?
is it because we are good at them?
or is it because people love us because we are good at them..?
and if our reason is the third one, is it still counted as passion?
or is thirst for fame..?
hmm...
...the end...
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Sunday, April 15, 2007
9:59 PM
thank You..
to my beloved reader/s.. as if there are any..
please forgive for not being able to publish a new post for the previous day..
when i got home i was dead tired and i immediately fell asleep..
being unable to update my blog was also quite unfortunate because yesterday was absolutely wonderful.. it was sooo happy. :)
i was sooo happy.
we were sooo happy.
thank You..
thank you..
it was his birthday yesterday..
we saw a movie.. :D
ate pizza and nachos..
and.. just had a great time.. just forgot about everything that could make us feel angry or worried or sad..
it was perfect..
and i wish that yesterday never had to end..
but it had to.. :(
sorry.. i'm just not in the mood to type a long post..
all i have to say is..
thank you..
and most importantly.. thank You..
sooo much..
...the end...
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Friday, April 13, 2007
9:19 PM
silence..
first of all, i would like to greet everyone a happy friday the thirteenth.. :))
now, moving on...
silence is deafening.. oh yes it truly is..
but sometimes, silence can also make you hear the most beautiful music..
just like a while ago..
my mom, my dad, and i entered the house..
it was quiet and calm.. no one was watching tv, laughing, or running around.. it was peaceful..
it was different..
and i liked it..
i got my guitar.. played a piece.. then for the first time in a long time, i actually really heard what i was playing..
silence made me hear every note that i played and every mistake that i had to correct.. no humming of the electric fan, no hyperactive boy laughing boisterously, no fat woman speaking deafeningly..
all i heard was music.. sweet sweet music..
but after playing that piece, i felt as if something was missing..
like i played an incomplete piece..
maybe it was because the guitar that i used lacked its 4th string..
[[that was a joke.. please laugh as if you mean it.. :P]]
so i got my yamiii.. :)
i played a number of pieces.. my mother intently listened to my playing.. she even closed her eyes..
and although i played no perfect piece.. although i made a lot of inaccuracies.. everything sounded unblemished..
and it was all because of silence..
then my parents had to leave so i was left alone..
as i started putting my guitar back in its case, i started hearing the cars and motorcycles outside.. the softly buzzing fan that my mom turned on.. the laughter of the people outside..
my 20 minutes of serenity was up..
my 20 minutes of golden silence..
so i resumed my scheduled tasks which involved no silence whatsoever..
...the end...
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Thursday, April 12, 2007
9:31 PM
tests.. tests.. tests..
unfortunately, i won't be able to provide you with a substantial post..
i still have to answer the tests that i missed..
nyt nyt..
bbye..
...the end...
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Wednesday, April 11, 2007
10:35 PM
realization..
hmm.. i know i said that i hate her and that i wouldn't even cry when she dies..
but.. hmm.. maybe i don't hate her.. maybe she just bugs me all the time..
but she never really does anything to irritate me.. i mean.. nothing intentionally..
she just does.
almost everything about her does.
but when i got home today, she asked me how my day was..
as usual, i mumbled "okay lng.."..
then she asked "it was okay?"
i nodded..
i always hear that from the people here..
"how was your day?"
and i always mumble my usual answer.. "okay lng.."
but when she asked me, it was as if she really wanted to know how my day was.. as if she really cared..
and when i showed her my report card, she was so happy for me..
then she said some things to me..
which in a way.. really touched me..
so.. i guess i don't hate her..
and sure.. maybe i'll cry when she dies..
ho hum..
that's life..
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
i saw him today..
*happeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee*
:D
*epal na lalake.. kakaasar noh?*
~ excited na akooooooooooooooooo.. saturday.. :) ~
thank you so much Lord.. :D
...the end...
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Tuesday, April 10, 2007
8:38 PM
in the middle of the introduction, disruption came along..
they say that absence makes the heart grow fonder..
when two people who love each other are apart, they start to miss each other.. very much.. sometimes too much..
i used to think that that saying applied to me..
i guess it no longer does..
after more than a week, we saw each other today..
and i must say.. as the days of not seeing him personally passed, our conversations became worse..
i became more and more irritable..
i became irate at the smallest mistakes.. most of the time, they weren't even mistakes..
and yet, he never got mad at me..
i guess the saying applies to him..
last night was my breaking point..
if you know what i mean..
and of course, he tried to convince me to think the contrary.. to do the contrary..
actually, he did.. he did convince me.. but he didn't even need to try.. it was so apparent that what i was doing was against my will..
as i said earlier, we saw each other today..
all throughout the morning, i was planning the "curtain call of our play"..
i even typed into my cellphone the important points of my discourse..
i wanted to make sure he would have as little questions as possible..
anyway, lunchtime came..
i went to our rendezvous.. he wasn't there..
"he stood me up.."
i knew that i deserved it.. after all, i was the one who was ending the play just as it was in the middle of the introduction..
and so, i sulked as my friends ordered their food..
and then, i thought i saw him..
my friend looked out the window.. "it's him!"
so did my other friend.. "it's him!"
my heart started beating so fast..
but it wasn't him..
:'(..
and so i continued my sulking..
i couldn't help it anymore..
so i called him up..
he was on his way..
:)..
and he arrived..
we sat beside each other..
silent.
i wanted to end it..
but i didn't want to..
so i ended up being silent.
we ended up being silent.
veeeeery silent.
he accompanied me to the review center..
*guard disrupts our moment* :-L
we went up one floor.. *ahem* said goodbye.. then i said "i love you.."..
he said "wait a minute, what about our conversation last night?"..
she said "forget about it.. have to go.. bye.. i love you.."..
*he tugs her arm*
*ahem*
all i'm trying to say is that...
absence DOES NOT make the heart grow fonder..
at least for me..
missing someone too much makes me bitchy and invidious..
*sigh* oh well..
i'm just glad that the play hasn't ended..
now where were we? oh yes! in the middle of the introduction..
on with the play!! :)
...the end...
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Monday, April 09, 2007
10:08 PM
rage.. calmness..
rage rage oh glorious rage
there's no time to think
rationality disappears in a blink
rage rage oh glorious rage
i've seen its effects
all action and speech become very direct
hah.. it seems that i am too angry to finish this poem..
bye.
p.s.
calmness calmness oh sweet sweet calmness
'tis what a raging heart craves and desires
'tis what can soothe its raging fires
calmness calmness oh sweet sweet calmness
i need you now, my sanity is at stake
oh please drown me in your serene lake
...the end...
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8:21 PM
sincerity..
today, i won't tire you with the things that i did..
instead, i will be sharing to you one of my views on sincerity..
sincerity.. hmm.. it has sooooo many aspects..
let's just focus on one..
sincerity in prayer.. specifically, the Catholics..
*note: this will most probably be a biased post*
last saturday to sunday, i "celebrated" (as we Catholics were taught to say) the Easter Vigil mass..
as our choir was singing, i observed the people who were also "celebrating" the mass..
it wasn't really that much of a "celebration"..
the people were just mumbling the memorized prayers.. they were just staring at the pictures as the readings were being perused.. some were just following whatever the commentator was saying.. "please sit." "please stand." "please kneel."
and yes, i know.. since i was able to observe all of these, i was obviously one of those people who weren't really sincerely "celebrating" the mass..
but.. come on.. cut us some slack.. after years of doing the same routine over and over, it was bound to become monotonous and boring..
the only thing that we had the power to change was the selection of songs.. yey us!! :))
anyway, i think you get my point..
the rituals and ceremonies of the Catholic church have already been repeated so many times.. they have no intention of even modifying it just a little bit..
and everything's so rehearsed..
because of all of these, the people have been gradually losing their sincerity whenever they "celebrate" mass..
hah! isn't this post so ironic?
i'm saying these things and yet i am a Catholic.. or am i...? :))
hmm.. well.. that's all..
at least i actually put something meaningful in this post..
to devout Catholics, i mean you no harm.. peace.. :D :)>-
i'm just saying, a little excitement and change might do our religion some good..
it might actually strengthen our faith..
but hey, that's just me.. :)
i better end this post before i say anything *insert desired adjective here*..
after all, religion is a very sensitive topic..
bbye!! :P
...the end...
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Sunday, April 08, 2007
9:37 PM
hapi easter..
oh yes.. happy easter to everyone..
happy 6th sort of monthsary.. :))
sorry.. i'm not really in the mood to update..
despondency has obviously struck me once again..
bbye.
...the end...
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Saturday, April 07, 2007
3:42 PM
...sounds familiar..
i am updating my blog for the sake of it being updated..
hmm.. sounds familiar.. :))
...the end...
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Friday, April 06, 2007
10:30 PM
execrate me if you must
a sudden surge of emotions..
and.. tada!
another poem.. ;)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
execrate me if you must
for the slightest touch sets me off
like a land mine awaiting its victim
showing no mercy to anyone
so execrate me if you must
excrate me if you must
for i find the most blithe wonders of life loathsome
like a bitter old hag muttering to herself
showing no compassion to anyone
so execrate me if you must
excrate me if you must
for i pay no heed to everything
like a man in solitary confinement
showing no concern to anyone
so execrate me if you must
execrate me if you must
for only animosity fills my heart
like a battered child who was never given love
showing no gratitude to anyone
so execrate me if you must
execrate me if you must
for if the truth be told, you've changed all of that
like a silent fool never displaying her true emotions
showing only the contrary to you
so execrate me if you must
...the end...
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9:53 PM
ambulating..
i've missed ambulating with my friends..
just ambulating around the soccer field..
walking in cyberzone..
i miss those moments..
today, what did i do?
not much..
watched tv..
watched tv..
watched "The Ugly Duckling and Me"..
went to church..
walked for almost 2 hours..
went home..
rested..
and here i am..
such a boring day..
but i did find "The Ugly Duckling and Me" very cute and funny..
Ugly was sooooooooooooo adorable.. :D
since it's late [?], and i'm tired..
i'm going to cut this post short..
bbye!
...the end...
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Thursday, April 05, 2007
8:34 PM
ho hum..
today was definitely duller than yesterday..
but hey, maybe some excitement will transpire later on when we go on our annual bisita iglesia..
but i highly doubt it.
hmm..
today..
i woke up at around 12 noon..
ate lunch..
watched tv..
attended choir practice..
went home..
and here i am..
next topic.. hmm..
i am desperately in need of a way to get out of my "freezing dilemma"..
if you know what i mean..
i've actually thought of breaking my leg or giving myself pneumonia..
after all, i've still got a few weeks... yes, i am dead serious.. and very determined..
i know what you guys are thinking.. why not just tell them? tell them i refuse to concede their "gelid conditions"..
i tried once.. i didn't really tell them.. i just implied it..
and what did they tell me?
it's a once in a lifetime opportunity.. they would never be able to give that to me.. i should just take it while it's there.. while it's being offered to me..
yes, i understood their side..
but i was never really given the chance to decide first..
piggy made all the decisions for me..
and what did stupid ada do?
she chose the cruise date, she helped piggy fill out the form for ada's visa..
ada let it get this far.. now, there's very little chance that she'll still be able to consummate her summer plans..
*why the heck am i referring to myself using the third person POV?*
if i tell them that i don't want to go because i want to take classical guitar lessons, what will they say?
~ you can take lessons anytime.. but this, this doesn't come along very often..
what would i think to myself? (yes, i rarely speak my mind)
~ but i've been planning to take lessons this summer all year long.. i even told my mom about it.. i guess she forgot..
if i tell them that i don't want to go because i think 3 weeks is too long and i'm with piggy ONLY, what will they say?
~ she's family! what's wrong with having to stay with ONLY her for 3 weeks? you live with her here, you can live with her there!!
~ offers like those come once in a blue moon.. you should be thankful that you're staying there for 3 weeks..
what would i think to myself?
~ people get home sick.. for me, 3 weeks is way too long.. and yes, i live with piggy.. but at least there are other people with us, specifically my sister.. she won't be there with us, which makes the 3-week "vacation" worse..
if i tell them that i don't want to go because of 7_ ! () \, what will they say?
~ so you want to pass up this offer because of him?! it's just 3 weeks.. and you're still very young.. you'll meet a lot of other people..
what would i think to myself?
~ you don't know how i feel about this whole situation.. i was never able to deicide for myself.. you never considered what i wanted.. and yeah, sure.. i will still meet a lot of other people.. but i won't care about them the way i care about him.. of all the people, you guys should know how love affects/changes a person.. 3 weeks away from him may sound like a short time to you, but for me, it's like 3 decades.. i know you guys love me, so why can't you even respect or accept my reason..? because my reason is just a boy? well, he's a boy that i love.. please respect that..
but of course.. they will never know any of that..
and i will be forced to freeze in the distance...
and so, i end this post..
bbye.
*please excuse the errors in this post.. if there are any..*
...the end...
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Wednesday, April 04, 2007
8:48 PM
dullness..
as usual.. i am going to relay to you today's dull events..
since i have suddenly received a number of posts in my tagboard, i now know that people still do care.. i feel so motivated to not disappoint them..
anyway.. enough with the crappy introduction..
it's obviously one of my subtle ways to make this post longer..
so... what happened today..?
i woke up..
got ready for the review class..
fetched iya..
went to kostka..
reviewed geometry..
ate lunch at red ribbon.. their service sucked..
reviewed chemistry.. zZzZzZz...
ate at shakey's with iya, my folks, and my FAT bro..
took iya to her home..
went home..
etcetera etcetera etceteraaaaaaaa..
yes.. a very dull day indeed..
well.. today, of course, still had its comedic side..
'nakangiti cya." *with matching pose*
and this lovely modified "quotation"..
chefs out there, if you want to flirt with someone and get rejected, just say these lines to that person:
"you know what, i think you're one hot dish. if i were to cook you, i'd marinate you in a special sauce with just the right amount of sweetness, tenderize you with tons of kisses, and then cook you in the warmth of my love."
how.....sweet....? :-/ :))
another lovely "quotation"..
"spread the love. don't read the shoebox labels."
haha.. you have to know the story behind it to be able to get the punchline..
anywaaaaaaay...
i might post another poem again..
i'm finding it reeeaaaaaalllly vexatious.. *sigh*
that's all for today.. goodbye class.. =P
bbye.
btw, please excuse any type of error in this post.. if there are any.
...the end...
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Tuesday, April 03, 2007
8:37 PM
another update..
yes.. i am once again updating my blog..
i guess i don't have much to do that's why i now have time for my precious blog..
another update.. although based on the posts in my tagboard, no one seems to care..
oh well.. life is just so freakin' peachy.
today.. hmm... what can i say about today's events..?
definitely better than yesterday..
english.. easier.. MUCH easier..
math.. third year lessons.. better.. MUCH better..
but i was also "ms. grogita" almost the whole day..
actually, even ina and iya were "ms. grogitas"..
hmm..
what else what else what else?
i don't really have anything to say anymore..
but i must keep typing.. i must... i must..
maybe, just maybe.. if i make my posts longer, someone will actually read them..
haha. just kidding..
i know my blog isn't really worth visiting.... *sniff* *oh the freakin' DRAMA!!!*
this post is all over the place..
i'm jumping from one topic to another..
haha. bear with me..
i'm desperately trying to make this post longer.. :))
oh oh!! i've finally thought of a topic.. :))
hmm.. you see.. our review class isn't exactly.. a class.. we're more of a group of people who don't know each other, but go to the same place everyday to review for their college entrance tests..
but there are some friendly people out there..
like nanny/nani/nanni/nannee/nanee.. i obviously don't know how to spell her name..
but she's really nice.. so is ruth..
hmm.. speaking of friends, today, i ran into a friend of mine..
miggy.. :) we see each other every week [church/choir] but we never really talk.. i think we haven't spoken in over a year.. haha.. what a wonderful friendship.. but we did today.. that was nice..
he's also taking review classes.. also in expert guides.. but in a different batch.. nice life.. nice life.. ;)
i think this post is long enough.. haha...
okay.. so there.. another post which no one will read..
bbye.. :)
thanks for everthing Lord..
i love you..
...the end...
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Monday, April 02, 2007
10:41 PM
nyargh..
today sucks..
today was boring, dull, and... did i say boring..?
well, not entirely.. i was still able to get some laughs with ina and iya..
but the review class..
*zZz*
and the tests, especially in vocabulary, were BOGUS..
sure, i know those are REAL words.. but guess what? laymen DON'T use those words.. and i'm one of them..
for example, why in the world would you use the word somnambulist instead of sleepwalker??
it simply isn't done.. haha. just joking..
my scores were low.. VERY low.. nice.. another self-esteem booster for me..
now, i feel like i know everything.. *note the sarcastic tone*
i feel like shit..
i don't know why..
i guess i really am going mad.. oh well..
people in the house are you ready???
yup.. they are definitely ready..
ready to provoke my tendencies to become legally insane..
piggy..
she's a bitch.. very mean and hot-headed.. her face is always.. hmm.. how do i describe her constant expression? let's just say she looks like shit.. yeah, i know.. i'm mean.. but so is she.. i also hate it whenever she tells us her oh-so-wonderful stories.. she ALWAYS exaggerates everything.. and she talks as if she knows everything.. she always wants to have her way.. especially when it comes to food..
prune..
ahh yes.. the wrinkly one.. i hate her.. her voice bugs me.. her walk bugs me.. everything about her bugs me.. can't wait 'til she dies..
her..
she's nice.. i love her.. of course i do.. i'm just not fond of telling her the things that i do everyday.. she always asks me while i'm eating or in the car and it really irritates me..
him..
he's nice.. i love him.. of course i do.. like her, he also asks too many questions.. not as many as her, but i still don't like it..
she..
kinda like my buddy.. although sometimes she is also mean to me.. i don't mind.. after all, it's her job to be mean to me.. but she rarely does that anymore.. which is really nice.. :)
he..
just a boy.. just an ordinary boy.. he has done me no wrong.. but he's acquired some disgusting traits from piggy and prune.. that sucks.. oh well.. i'll just have to be mean to him.. after all, it is also my duty.. but, of course, i'll still be nice to him once in a while..
and those are the people who in their little or huge ways, make my life a living heaven or hell everyday.. mostly hell..
that's all folks.. bbye.
[[if there are any grammatical or typographical errors in this post, LIVE WITH IT.]]
...the end...
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